... 'cause Contreras, the bed was crapping ...Let's try to figure out where
Saturday's flop against the Cubs fits in the Jose Contreras Distraction Scale:
10.0: Imprisoned for a crime he didn't commit.
9.0: Served with divorce papers.
8.0: Served with subpoena in a smuggling investigation.
7.0: Prescription for back pills wasn't ready.
6.0: Missing family in Cuba. (n/a)
5.0: Ill-fitting cup.4.0: Filled car up with unleaded instead of plus though dashboard recommended otherwise.
3.0: McDonald's cashier wouldn't give him 10 percent discount.
2.0: He is assessed for street repairs -- $40 per house, $115 per hotel.
1.0: Struggling with the English language.
Whatever the case may be, Contreras clearly didn't have it today. To some point, I can understand why Ozzie Guillen stuck with him for as long as he did, but this goes back to what I
bitched wrote about last week: the uselessness of having two long relievers when the manager doesn't like to use one.
Guillen will give his starters every chance to get through five innings, but if there was a starter begging to receive the early exit, Contreras was the guy. He had no forkball, which means he had to keep dropping down, which, as we know,
spells disaster. After the third consecutive single, it would've been an ideal time to try Boone Logan.
Nick Masset and Adam Russell ended up throwing their two innings apiece, but well after the game was out of hand. That defeats the purpose of having a seven-man bullpen with two long relievers. It's supposed to give the manager a luxury of using an early hook without worrying about taxing the relief corps heavily. By the time Masset got in the game, Russell's real utility had already expired.
That's my biggest beef with Guillen's handling of Contreras. It's not because he made a wrong assessment of his starter, but because he missed a rare opportunity to use a pitcher the Sox don't have much use for.
Now the focus turns to Javier Vazquez, who has allowed 14 runs and a 1.000 OPS over his last three starts (17 1/3 innings). If he wants to re-establish his ace status, tonight would be the night to do it, since the game is:
- Against a first-place team.
- Against a high-quality pitcher.
- On the road.
- Needed to stop a skid.
Yup, this is the situation that defines a No. 1 starter.
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... while Ozzie and Lou started rapping, like they never had before:Yup. That's Ozzie Guillen and Lou Piniella trading rhymes.
Deadspin calls it "the worst rap in the history of car commercials," although I would nominate:
Push it!
Pull it!
Tow it to Oak Mill Ford!
Yeah, do it like Stu
And you'll save, too!
But the fact that I still remember that ad for Oak Mill Ford makes it a good one. And since they now made me aware of Chevrolet Tent Event, it appears GM got what it wanted out of it, too.
Nevermore, fellas.
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Minor league roundup:- Lehigh Valley 3, Charlotte 2
- Dave Cook hit his first homer at Charlotte, and Brad Eldred his own solo shot, his 26th.
- Chris Getz went 3-for-4 with a double, and Javier Castillo had two hits.
- Charlie Haeger didn't deserve to get stuck with the loss -- in relief of Esteban Loaiza, he allowed one unearned run on two hits and a walk over six innings, striking out six.
- Birmingham 2, Jacksonville 0
- Carlos Torres pitched eight shutout innings, scattering six hits and three walks while striking out eight.
- Jon Link pitched a perfect ninth for his 19th save.
- Ricardo Nanita went 2-for-3 with an RBI and a run scored.
- Former Sox farmhand B.J. LaMura, dealt when the Sox acquired Sandy Alomar Jr. for the 14th time, took the loss.
- Winston-Salem 10, Wilmington 8
- Paulo Orlando had a perfect day, going 5-for-5 with three runs scored and an RBI.
- John Shelby went 2-for-4 with a homer and four RBI.
- Brandon Allen, C.J. Retherford and Brett Bonvechio joined Shelby with two hits of their own.
- Anthony Carter picked up his first win at High-A ball, allowing two runs over six innings on five hits and two walks. He didn't record a strikeout.
- Kannapolis 14, West Virginia 3
- Mark Fleisher's grand slam highlighted a 2-for-4, five-RBI night.
- Jim Gallagher had four hits in six at-bats, and Sergio Miranda went 2-for-4 with two runs scored and two RBI.
- Sergio Morales reached base four times and scored three runs, and Dale Mollenhauer and Logan Johnson also had two hits.
- Jason Rice picked up the win with six innings of two-run ball.
- Bristol 10, Burlington 4
- Juan Silverio drove in seven runs, with a grand slam among his three hits.
- Justin Greene scored four runs, racking up three hits, two doubles and a walk out of the leadoff spot.
- Garrett Johnson struck out seven over 5 1/3 innings, allowing six hits and two runs (one earned).
- Great Falls 4, Billings 3 (10 innings)
- Eduardo Escobar went 4-for-5 with a double out of the leadoff spot.
- Fourth-round pick Brent Morel went 2-for-3, with his second triple in four games.
- 2006 eighth-round pick Kent Gerst went 2-for-4 with a homer, a double, two RBI and a walk.
- Starter Daniel Hudson pitched three scoreless innings, allowing one hit and striking out four.